Star Signs Reloaded

The Lost Signs will be revealed – now!

You are different?

Astrologers claim you are Gemini – but the two of you disagree?

Forecasts fail?

Stop torturing yourself! It’s time for reevaluation

Sign: Element: Traits: Goes BestWith:
Octopus Water Cuddly Mole, Whimperer, Zombie
Bat Air Sucker Turtle, Vagabond, Hag
Mole Earth Tunnel Visioned Octopus, Zombie, Whimperer
Turtle Fire Sulky Bat, Hag, Vagabond
Hag Fire Heretical Vagabond, Turtle, Bat
Whimperer Water Soggy Zombie, Octopus, Mole
Vagabond Air Sleazy Hag, Bat, Turtle
Zombie Earth Survivor Whimperer, Mole, Octopus

You want to scream: Help I’m a Hag!

Calm down – relax. Medieval times are over no one’s gonna burn you at the stake.

Far from it, you probably get your own TV-Show (I can’t guarantee they won’t burn you, if it’s reality TV).

.

You suspect your spouse to be a Zombie?

Well, if you were hoping for an inheritance soon, I have to disappoint you they tend to live forever.

Go for a Turtle next time they sometimes have been declared for dead after retreating to their shell – chances they won’t come out again are pretty good.

So, what about you – do you know who you are?

Great! Tell me!!!

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Sign Of The Octopus

Being different is so hard!

All the attention you get is not really worth the trouble – unless of course, you know how to make money out of it.

Other people’s standards don’t fit you – nobody will ever reach your standards.

Exhausted from trying too hard to fit in – here I am – confessing.

I do blush sometimes – but I really don’t want anybody mentioning it.

I don’t mind the dark but too much sun is scary.

Moonlight is so much healthier no time limit, no sunscreen, no burning to ashes.

I don’t have a soft spot – my whole body is one soft spot – I am a very delicate creature, but I will not allow anyone to mess around with me!

Octopus Love – click and laugh or cry it’s up to you

Born under the sign of the Octopus.

That’s a well known fact in my home galaxy – here nobody seems to have heard of it!

Other signs don’t fit me.

I’m an Octopus damn it!

It’s like the mystery of why everybody knows the own star sign – but still claims –  not to believe in it.

Facts and imperative stuff:

Once I grabbed something I won’t let go again – ever!

I like to cuddle real tight, real long, real hard – you can’t breathe – not my problem!

I don’t like being without water or without someone to cuddle!

I am a seriously misunderstood creature