Ring Around The Rosie

It’s not a crime to trip and fall one might think. Obviously not everybody thinks that way.

He did not only lose the ring, but also his patience not to mention his fiancé. I don’t blame the girl, you wouldn’t either, after seeing the guy.

He had no right to blame me for that and certainly none to punish my car!

I was chasing the guy, while he was chasing his ex-fiancé, when her quarterback of a brother, decided to come after me.

So, while they where foaming at the mouth, I tried to maintain some grace.

I don’t go screaming the place down – I curl up to fetal position and cover myself with a blanket.

I decided I’d stop squandering good manners to the ungrateful.

Don’t they know the rules of common courtesy?

How barbaric.

Would it kill you to show some compassion?

Tired by all that fuss, I suggested he should sort things out with her.

I mean really he’d probably just need to toss a rose onto her lap.

I’m pretty sure they did not suffer from rabies, but I wish I could say the same about derangement.

Advertisements

What I Failed At – Effective Healthcare

An apple a day keep’s the doctor away. Had 10 today couldn’t notice any repelling effect.

Does that make me a looser? I don’t know you tell me!

Avoid Dark Alleys And Muskrats

It was definitely the wrong turn to take.

I was lost, it was so dark, wet, and creepy.

Believe me there are better places for loitering.

This shifty little bugger snitched my pen.

It’s a pen, so what, get another one damnit – you say?

That objection seems reasonable, at first!

You must know:

I hang on to it for sentimental reasons.

I wouldn’t make a fuzz about it – but it was my favorite  – I snitched it from my math teacher once.

So, you see it’s imperative I get it back.

My precious, my treasure … *cough* … sorry fishbone stuck in my throat.

Don’t let the fluffy furiness ensnare you – there is a criminal mind at work.

Have you seen this muskrat?

Current residence of the fugitive unknown.

Any relevant information will be appreciated.

But not rewarded!

Does anyone know if you turn into something weird, after being bitten by a muskrat?

I was never into that superhero thing.

Hope Unites Globally – Splendid Marvellous Wonderful

Barely awakening from my Irish-Coffee-Coma, I realise that a load of honor has been dumped over me, again, and I just didn’t get it.

Lovely Lynn had the kindness to give me the HUG Award!

You can find her right here: http://deceitfulland.wordpress.com

This award is a bit different than the other blogger-awards (it took me a while to figure it all out, and I’m glad this lady: LScott helped me to do so).

Now, me being absolutely – not modest at all – well, I do not only feel the urge to give back, but to do my best to drag others into my misery loving arms.

Once I’m determined to like you – there will be no escape!

This is how it works: instructions

Read it and weep – I did.

There’s nothing so heartwarming like a dearly hug – the next best thing is: to get the H.U.G. Award.

I wanna give a H.U.G. to these guys:


Time Warp

I’m having déjà-vu after déjà-vu, driving me crazy.

Daylight saving time a natural killer of brain cells.

I have constantly the feeling of: been there done that.

I’m confused, at times I forget what day it is – I’m stuck on Sunday, I deny the existence of Mondays.

Getting out of bed, taking a shower, having breakfast – I could swear I’ve done that before!

I have no idea how many breakfast-coffees I had today, or yesterday, or the day before, but I’m trembling.

I guess, my shaking body might be some sort of alarm signal.

What would Captain Picard do, Mr. Spock suggest, or Dr. McCoy prescribe?

Daylight saving time – I’d rather save my sanity than daylight – there’s a new day every day, but you’re only given a limited amount of brain cells.

The mailman resembles Data more from day to day – I guess I watched too many episodes of …

… damn I can’t remember!

Well, probably I’m just tired, I should get me a coffee.

Muffins Of Good Will

As I’ve become a major subject of interest in my neighborhood, lately, I get a lot of invitations to drop by for a visit.

I figured a nice housewarming present will never fail, so I brought along my famous:

one-muffin-will-keep-you-stuffed-for-a-week-basket.

The noble cockroach, had already claimed the whole territory, as far as I could tell.

The place could have used a bit of improvement.

No sighting of the kids, though.

They’re hiding – just shy I guess – they’ll come out when the fire alarm goes off.

I acted immediately.

After all, things tend to look better, when given a good wash …

Things I Don’t Get – Good Help

Things that needed to be done – the results I ended up with

Picture by tinou bao

The laundry – drowned carpets and spiders, because of the flood I caused

The dishes – less dishes to do in future, due to reduced amount of plates, cups, bowls (may they rest in peace)

The dinner – unhealthy fumes in the kitchen, walls went slightly grey (can an oven burn itself up, too?), anyway the lasagna tasted very smoky and a bit rubbery

The grocery shopping – got enough chips to party every day til doomsday, unfortunately no water, fruits or vegetables, although I guess, I could easily substitute the fruits and veggies with gummy bears (they got all the colors)

Do I need help?

Certainly, I do!

Unfortunaltely can’t afford servants…

Moments In Life

Picture by lawmurray

I feel the same.

See here!

Thank good I’m wearing underwear on a daily basis lately.